I once had a manager who believed weekly group meetings were sufficient for communication. They were busy, with many direct reports, and tried to hold smaller group sessions to coordinate work rather than scheduling any dedicated 1:1s. As a result, I often felt underappreciated, undercoached, and unsure of how to develop further in my career.
Because we lacked regular time for deeper discussions, decisions were rushed or misunderstood. Over time, this led to a culture of confusion and misalignment. Team members didn’t feel comfortable raising sensitive issues in front of everyone, and more nuanced problems were rarely explored. Ultimately, we veered off course as our sense of team cohesion eroded.
This lack of personal interaction took a toll on morale and productivity. In a few short months, frustration among team members grew significantly. In my experience, 1:1s are an invaluable opportunity to connect more meaningfully with your manager, and to that end, I’ve found the 10-10-10 framework to be incredibly effective.
The 10-10-10 Framework
The 10-10-10 framework dedicates:
10 minutes for personal connection
10 minutes for status updates
10 minutes for professional development
This balanced approach ensures you cover not just immediate work demands but also the deeper, more personal elements of collaboration.
Note: A similar concept is advocated by leadership experts like Mark Horstman, author of The Effective Manager, who emphasizes the importance of regular, structured 1:1s for building trust, alignment, and long-term development. Additionally, Andy Grove in High Output Management underscores how consistent, well-structured check-ins can significantly improve individual and team performance.
1) 10 Minutes for Personal Connection
Build Trust with your team. In her book Radical Candor, Kim Scott explains how a strong personal connection with your team helps to enable open communication and for the team members to feel comfortable sharing positive and negative feedback with their manager. If you don’t take this time to build authentic personal connections with your team, then you will struggle to receive any constructive feedback from them. I also have found that this time is key in understanding personal motivation and engagement. Each team member is motivated by slightly different things, and understanding their personal motivations and goals can help to unlock these insights.
Purpose: Build rapport, trust, and mutual understanding.
Focus: Ask open-ended questions about life outside of work—weekends, family, personal interests.
Benefit: Establishes a safe space where team members feel valued as individuals, not just employees.
2) 10 Minutes for Status and Strategy
Many employees feel this is the most important part of the 1:1 because they want to make sure their accomplishments are known. As you level-up, your boss will likely become more disconnected from your day-to-day or big accomplishments that are just part of your role. This time often helps to uncover the major impact that is often unseen. I often find this time is where I as the manager am able to ask more detailed questions “Are you feeling supported by the other team?”, “How is Sally’s design coming along? Is it going to be done by when you need it?”
Purpose: Align on current tasks and potential blockers.
Focus: Review project milestones, upcoming deadlines, and any necessary resources. Dive deeper into details that might be glossed over in group meetings.
Benefit: Prevents miscommunication, addresses issues before they escalate, and ensures your manager stays connected to your day-to-day work.
3) 10 Minutes for Development
Your primary job as a Manager is to develop your team. Not just to get stuff done. As a people manager, it is mostly about the people, their career, and finding ways to multiply their results. Your ability to coach and influence to further their career, aspirations, or seed the common team culture are done best in a 1:1, where questions can be asked and clarity can help gain support for the future.
Purpose: Focus on long-term growth, learning, and team culture.
Focus: Discuss career goals, new skills, and potential stretch assignments. This is also a chance to reinforce cultural values.
Benefit: Promotes continuous professional development, inspires a forward-looking mindset, and demonstrates genuine investment in your people.
Putting It All Together
Integrating regular 1:1 meetings with a structured approach like 10-10-10 can transform your leadership style—and your team’s results. Here are four steps to begin:
Schedule Consistently: Set up recurring 1:1s and protect this time as you would any other high-priority meeting.
Prepare Both Sides: Encourage direct reports to come with topics, challenges, and wins. As a manager, bring insights and questions.
Listen Actively: Use the 10-10-10 breakdown to ensure you dedicate ample time to personal connection, status updates, and development.
Follow Up: Document action items and revisit them in subsequent meetings to track progress and accountability.
When done consistently and thoughtfully, 1:1s become more than just another meeting on the calendar; they become the heartbeat of a thriving, collaborative culture.
Final Thoughts
If your manager isn’t scheduling 1:1s, don’t hesitate—suggest (or even insist on) them. Regular, meaningful conversations lead to better outcomes, happier teams, and a more collaborative culture. After all, the best leaders know that great communication is the foundation of success.